Movie Review
Little, very very little
Edward Savoy
Issue date: 11/16/05 Section: Features
Since this will be the last article I'll have the opportunity to write for this paper, I was hoping I'd be able to go out with a bang, writing about a movie that would put great cinema, such as "The Godfather," to shame, a movie that I could praise to the skies and beyond. Instead, I get to write about "Chicken Little." As the recently fired-by-NBC Martha Stewart might say, that's not a good thing. For everyone who was desperately waiting for an adaptation of the story of Chicken Little that featured space aliens that were more than vaguely reminiscent of this year's film "War of the Worlds" and the guy from "Scrubs" voicing Chicken Little, this is your movie. For the rest of planet, this is your chance to see a version of the story that we all grew up with whose adaptations do nothing to further the plot or story or do anything vaguely relevant. If "Chicken Little" was a real bird, it would be a dodo, doddering and tottering to irrelevancy and extinction. Perhaps it is a little unfair to expect the same company, Disney, to put out another masterpiece, especially when they lack their Pixar collaborator, whose recent string of successes have included the "Toy Stories" movies, "Finding Nemo," and "The Incredibles;" it would be like saying to Peyton Manning "Ok, that was good throwing 49 touchdowns; now throw 60." Still, to be saddled with something this bad is a bit much to fathom. I was prepared to say that the movie was too short to develop any of its characters, for almost none are developed beyond caricatures; its plot, which exists only in theory and is developed in slopes and lurches; or its ideas, which, to be fair, are good and involve sound themes for parents, still cannot exist well without the development of the preceding. However, after further consideration, perhaps its short length is more of a blessing than a downfall. I loathed "Chicken Little" just as much as I have loved writing for this paper; that is, a great deal. The next movie review for this paper will be the product of a different pen, or keyboard, however you wish to poetically phrase it. May that next writer have the benefit of better movies than "Chicken Little" and better luck in watching them. So, dear reader, until we meet again down the road, may you always see good movies and always take pleasure in the best that that wretched, greedy, rapacious, wonderful, dream-filled town of Hollywood has to offer. Goodbye and good luck.
